Quote: Only this time, it's because DD17 is borderline depressed and can't seem to gain any weight.
Quote: We did lay out plainly, tho, the issues and symptoms our D was going thru, and the C didn't seem overly concerned, certainly not about depression or eating disorder, so that was comforting.
Okay, Choc - some advice from me here. Understand that the past year we went through a horrifying bout of anorexia and bulimia with our D14, and I have become a reluctant expert on eating disorders and depression. Also, I am a family physician.
- Let me say first - just because the therapist says she doesn't think there is anything wrong with your daughter doesn't make it true. The therapist hasn't even met her yet, and sad to say, unless you have lucked into one of the few good therapists who are experienced with EDs and actually know what they are doing, their opinion may not be worth squat.
I'm not saying your D has an ED, but kids with EDs are like drug addicts, often able to hide it very well and really sneaky about it, and the longer it goes undetected, the harder it is to fight it.
If you want to send me the details of what you have observed, I would be happy to give you a second opinion - elliestough at hotmail.com - or post it here if you like.
A pervasive but unsubstantiated "myth" about EDs is that they are caused by the parents. Yet the basic research all supports a largely biological cause - twin studies show 50 - 70% of identical twins of anorexics will develop it, while only 5-10% of fraternal twins. So don't fall into the trap of thinking this is all about you. Sure, family stress can be a trigger (one of many) but only the biologically pre-disposed will get the disease.
There are also medical reasons for failure to gain weight - if your D seems to be eating normally, I would be happy to discuss those possibilities with you.
Just don't sweep this under the rug. Sometimes people are so happy to hear what they want to hear from an authority figure that they will ignore the obvious right under their noses.
