How do LD's show desire for their spouse?

[cinemanymph]

Ce,
I was thinking about this very thing just the other night. It takes me (I am not going to speak for other LDs) a lot of thought to feel even the faintest spark, and many more mental gymnastics to fan that spark to a flame and yet more thought to take that flame to action and see it through to a satisfying conclusion. I do this quite often, in hopes that I will reach that sexual nirvana that I have read/heard about. I am envious of those who can get to desire easily. I've often wished that I were of higher desire.

I want to offer an anology: Imagine an alcoholic who has to walk past several bars on his way to work. He has to deal with the urge to drink and all the destruction associated with drinking as he passes each tavern. Depleted of most of his energy, he finally gets to work and either does his work by rote or hopes he can nap unnoticed.

I am posting this for you Ce, so maybe you can try to begin to see the other side. You say you can't possibly imagine not wanting to be touched. Try to understand that your W may have very good reasons for not wanting to be touched and they may or may not have anything to do with you. Make it easier for her to come to you and tell you what she is thinking and feeling. Try this question, "I want to be a better husband, can you tell me how I can do that?" Then let her think about it. Demonstrate that you are strong enough to deal with whatever she has to say.