Need some help here. Been in the LRT for 3 months now and haven't seen any visible improvement. I know patience are a virtue but I haven't been feeling very virtuous this week. I know the usual DB response will be to go do something good for myself, but sometimes it just feels like a temporary fix and then the "high" is gone and it's back to reality. I know someone will comment that I am giving too much power to WAW & OM. I know that I should not let them dictate my mood. I also know that I hate parts of my life right now and to quote Tom Petty, "The waiting is the hardest part." All the 180's that I've done, now look at me and seem to laugh because they have not changed the sitch. When I look at them, all they do is remind me why I did them in the first place. I did it not so much for me, but because of the sitch. I would not have done some of them if it weren't for the sitch. The thing I really want to do for myself is first to find out what the heck is so unappealing about me, but I can't ask because that is "pursuing". So I feel like I am looking at the wizard up on the screen, when all the time I know he is behind the curtain and at times I feel stupid for even believing that what's up on the screen is worth believing in, because it isn't real.
