I've read some of your thread and your W reminds me a bit of how my H used to be. Always changing his mind, always hot and cold.
I wouldn't take it to heart, most of it's c**p anyway. Ex's always come out with hurtful stuff when there is a D going through. It will pass.
I think what your W needs is space and loads of it, and I think you do as well for your sanity.
Cut off and carry on trying to build your life as you are doing. DB'ing is a VERY long process. If she chooses to reinitiate things, then it will be after you've both had time apart from each other.
From what I've read, you're doing okay. Just try not to get sucked into all her drama (and it is drama, a lot of therapists in my opinion just inflame the situation - they are more about 'women's rights' and 'standing up for yourself' than actual R counselling).
My H too said he didn't love me, wanted a D, 'I'm never coming back' etc etc and at the end of the day, it's just words. They say things like that to make you angry, upset etc. Most of it isn't true.
Who knows? She may see the 'new you' and want you back but by then you might be with another wonderful woman and then she'd be thinking 'Oh, what did I do?' So keep your spirits up. I can honestly feel your pain and I know what it's like, but I can tell you from my own experience that regardless of how the M works out, it DOES eventually get better.
