The reason that I was worried about the 'secret' thing is because I keep feeling suspicious and thinking 'there must be a reason why we have to sneak around and he hasn't told anyone.'
I know he doesn't want to hurt the kids anymore than they already have been, but I am just worried in case he is 'keeping his options open' so to speak. I guess my issue is trust. I love him but haven't fully regained the trust and he hasn't either yet.
Being honest with people is a way of saying we are committed. But I know you're right; it's too early yet to be laying down rules. He usually responds well when I ask him something and I shouldn't be so nervous of the going out on a date, it's just that we haven't really had much time outside my home. He did ask me to buy him an 'all day' breakfast once
Also, because the relatives don't know, I have to lie when they ask about my situation or my life, and I don't like being dishonest. H also said once we've told the kids, he will stop overnight with me and I can stay at his house etc. As long as they are unaware, we have to sneak around and only get two hours here and there.
The thought of having my whole family under one roof excites me so much, I am so impatient! I just want it to happen NOW and wish he hadn't told me that, really.
I need all you people on here to keep me sane and patient. I want to win by not rushing at things, but don't wish to be a doormat either.
After I got in from moms and tots the other day, I found an msn message on my computer from him, saying I couldn't have the kids on tuesday because he was doing something but could I have them Thursday instead? I can't because I'm going to my osteopath for some therapy for a back injury so I'll have to discuss it with him tomorrow. He didn't mention my text on the R, so I think he's okay.
