Quote: …isn't that HER responsibility, to let you know if she doesn't like something that you are/aren't doing?
HD, at some level I KNOW that you’re right, but I’m having trouble just leaving it at that. That’s because I know that there are things bothering her and because nearly 30 years of experience tells me that she’s not going to talk about them. I’ve stumbled across a few – even a blind pig stumbles across an acorn every once in a while – and I’ve acted on those acorns that I’ve found. When I’ve acted, I’ve seen the dynamic of our R change radically. In short, I know I do things wrong and I know that addressing those things yields positive results in the R. So I want to address my shortcomings – but this pig is blind and needs someone to point things out to him.
Your sitch may be diametrically opposed to mine, but the end result is the same. When W says that I’m perfect, I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. When MrsHD says that you do everything wrong, you can’t tell what you really are doing wrong.
The fact is, I know that none of you can help me with this. I can’t make W talk and neither can any of you. And absent her telling me what she’s thinking and feeling, I’ll never know. So I’ll just keep rooting around for acorns and hoping for the best.
