I really do have a peace about it. I think I still need to make some changes, but she needs some major changes. I do have alot of confidence, this is her loss.
I am starting to see that WAS have major issues - like they are control freaks - they don't understand unconditional love.
Quote: Divorce has been filed by WAW. I'm done at this point. I was giving 150%, but it still wasn't enough.
I'm sorry to hear about the filing. If you have thought it through and need to give up, so be it. But think it over for a while before you do, you've come so far.
You have to do what you have to do. I'm sorry the outcome is D. From your posts, I know you gave it your all. Good luck to you and keep up yourself, first and foremost.
Well, I have my PMA. My asst pastor want me to go into Sports Ministry and I want to go to law school. That seed has been planted.
I am a alcoholic - ouch!!!
I don't need it to survive, I can go weeks without drinking. When I do drink, I get drunk. This has affected my M to my W. I can drink around other people with no problem, but around my W the resentment just comes out. So it has affected my M it must be a problem. I am moving forward, working on never drinking again.
Haven't talked to W in 2 weeks today, this is the longest since we met. I hear from MIL she is very depressed. No crap - She was depressed when we were not together and she is depressed when we are together. Happiness is truely a do-it-yourself job.
Back to hanging out with my FF. She told me that W is crazy for leaving me. Ego stroke. I am commited to my W as long as we are married, but I don't think it will be that much longer. I'm done, she's done. Time to let go and let God.
God is always working - when your focus is on him you are always changing for the better. I have alot of faith that it will not take long for God to interven. Alot of seeds have be planted in her from the Holy Spirit. So now I just sit back and watch the Holy Spirit work in her life and in my life.
I'm not on a roller coaster - I'm just working on me, she is out of my control.
Quote: I'm not on a roller coaster - I'm just working on me
Who am i kidding?
I'm planning on this weekend reading the bible and hanging out with my 87 year old grandfather. Which is a blessing that he is letting me stay at his farm. I will never get this precious time back with him. I am going to enjoy living with him until my W wants me to move back home. I'm going to do some soul searching this weekend and look for changes I can make.
Yeap - I'm back - why give up?
Galations 6:9 So don't get tired of doing what is good. Don't get discouraged and give up, for we will reap a harvest of blessing at the appropriate time.
Goals - Get the restraining order dropped Have my S5 call even though their is a RO W call our Pastor
Actions Continue to tithe and watch God work Resist the Devil - Drinking, cussing, and sin Don't listen to friends or family Don't contact MIL Reread Love must be tough
Long term Goals(this is my prayer list)
W wants me to move home W says she loves me W and I have another Baby W drops her Divorce I stop drinking W gets a new job W calls pastor I go back to school Not get involed with FF - at leat until my M is over I quit using tobacco W continues to become a sweeter person Be a Godly man Always admit my mistakes Wake up every morning and feeling today is a great day Make a differance by standing up for what is right. Work hard
I will be able to put dates on all of these, just you watch.
Welcome back, dude! It looks like BOTH of us are still in the game, eh? Remember to work what you are "for" and don't "fight" what you are against. It helps to emphasize the positive and eliminate the negative, as the song goes!
I too was glad to read about your decision to DB. Your stay with your grandfather sounds like a great fit - always nice to touch base with family in hard times.
I liked your list of goals. Stratch one off the list!
I can't keep posting and hanging out on this BB. It is taking a toll on me. I know what is right, but I haven't left this M twice within a year. After rereading Love Must Be Tough. I found some interesting things. Did I get enough time to make the changes? If I would have made the changes would she have stayed? Did I give my best effort? Did I break my promise to stay M for better or worse? Am I ever going to be perfect?
My L sent over a separation agreement to her L. This could be over quick. I have alot of reasons to fight for custody, but at this point I'm giving her my full trust with S5. Once again I'm trying to not let the hate build up. I have a different supporting cast around me than before. My L is a friend of mine and she is helping me see things so different than my previous L. My new L is not about making money as much as settling this whole thing with Diginty and Integrity. I thank God for her.
Truth be told - I do get more quality time with just visitation with S5 then when I was at home. W always had some honey-do list.
Now do I go to Law School or into Sports Ministry?