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#431524 04/12/05 11:05 AM
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Akron,

I think you are moving in the right direction. What are you doing to learn about forgiveness? Forgiveness of your W and yourself?

M


Every Day a New Day
#431525 04/14/05 10:58 AM
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Things are still moving forward. I haven't mentioned Sex in 3 days, that must be a first. I feel asleep last night before W and she came to bed and wanted to cuddle. I don't remember, but I guess I told her NO. Then this morning I get a phone call. Do you really Love me? My answer "Yes you are the most important thing in the world to me, I'm sorry I didn't want to cuddle I was just out of it and must have been really tired. I Love you very much." Hopefully me not bringing up Sex will get me more. Trying something different.

#431526 04/14/05 11:52 AM
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Akron29,
I read somthing in your post that worked for you and my W had mentioned it too me, it is when you said you ignored her she started to come around. My W and I are still living together and when I really just go about my business she usually tells me like the other day she told me why do you ignore us D2. The funny thing is I didn't ignore them. I am trying to figure this out more by living together. It seems i am walking a fine line of fighting for her and not to much pressure. I too told her I will no longer be treated like a doormat etc.. and that really got her attention, but now she will say stuff like are you going to the store with us or is it making you feel like a doormat. I just don't know what to do. I will continue on. Sounds like you have been DBing very well.

#431527 04/15/05 02:53 PM
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Drank to much last night, but made it to work. I am sure needy when I'm hungover. I think I must just feel sorry for myself. gotta stop that!!!! Still no talk about Sex. I've sent my W about 5 emails today to her 2. Who is counting at this point. A question for you F's. How can you show your wife you love her without smothering her?


I think I know the answer. She just needs to know she is more important to you than anything else in the world. Am I close?

#431528 04/15/05 03:01 PM
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Have you read the 5 love languages?? Personally I like to be touched, kissed, hugged, cuddled (physical touch) I also like quality time. But yes, being more important than your golf game, tv show, dringking buddies, mom, or hobbies is definitely a must...fill in the blanks with your activities and such.

Also, since sex seems to be an issue I can say from my own sitch that I didn't feel "loved" because my needs weren't being met...quality time and physical touch...I didn't feel like having sex. Hope that makes some sense to you.

Unsure

#431529 04/20/05 05:54 PM
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WAW wants me out of the house. She says I have not changed. I'm really trying here, so time to do some more work. I told her I will sleep in the basement for a while and she is free to leave if she wants. Big Fight with alcohol involved on both sides. Things where going great, I'm finding it very hard yet not that bad on giving her space. I gave her the I was wrong, I'm sorry, I Love you, Please forgive me. Now it is in her hands. I pray that she softens and continue to nice to her.

Goal - No more drinking ever, it just turns out bad sometimes.

#431530 04/20/05 06:20 PM
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Oh Akron, I'm so sorry. I have experienced this myself. It seems I can drink fine with other people but not with SO -- it nearly always turned out bad.

You are in my prayers.


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#431531 04/21/05 04:56 PM
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Were there any specifics in her statement that you haven't changed? Is there any accuracy in what she says? If so, have you identified the additional changes you need to make?


My latest thread
#431532 05/03/05 03:43 PM
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Divorce has been filed by WAW. I'm done at this point. I was giving 150%, but it still wasn't enough.

#431533 05/03/05 03:52 PM
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(((((((Akron))))))) I'm so sorry to hear that. Be confident that with all you've learned you will be O.K.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

LR

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