Sam, Ioavva has some real good advice here. Concentrate on you. Although it is hard not to call, I think it is your best course of action.
As for me, I'm thinking about letting go. W told me the other night that I shouldn't want her back after all she has done (meaning the divorce). She is steadfast that she will never come back. I just need to continue to work towards being her friend. Being her friend and being able to talk and confide in one another will be the key to establishing trust between us. I believe that the biggest reason she wouldn't consider a R with me is because she does not trust me. Her trust in me is so diminished that she believes that given the chance I would break her heart again. I know there is nothing I can say to bring back the trust. How do I let go of her while I still have hope? She is free now to do whatever she wishes, so in a way I have let go, however I still have hope. I still do nice things for her and in the back of my mind I think, maybe these nice things will bring her a little closer to me, Is this wrong? I do things for her for several reasons: Because I love to see her smile, her smile makes me happy. Because I believe that the acts of kindness will somehow make up for the past. Because I feel that hopefully she will she the changes a genuine and lasting, and maybe this will bring her closer to me. My goal is first to continue to establish a strong friendship with her, with the hopes of this friendship growing into something more. Is there anything wrong with this? The other night I mentioned that I felt she was coming around, meaning we were getting along better and she wasnt as angry with me. She got very defensive, she immediately asked "what do to mean I'm coming around" in a stern tone. I believe it upsets her when I have hope for us, when I interperate an act as feelings. She maintains there is not a romantic relationship and there will not be one.
