Well, I spoke to H on phone as dd4 is poorly and told him to come later at 4pm to give dd time to recover.
He did and we had coffee and chatted about what home ed stuff he is doing with the girls. I gave him some pictures dd4 had done. I told him I have an appointment with a nursery to look around it for dd4. He tried to convince me to home ed again but I said I spend so many hours writing and stuff it wouldn't be fair on dd4. I said if we're moving in together later anyway then I will just let him home ed the girls while I get on with my career.
He smiled so I reckon that must have been a good thing to say.
I asked him if I could go to one of dd's functions as even though he's said yes in the past, he doesn't invite me. He said 'yes' again but didn't commit to a date I could attend.
I asked him directly what the matter was (he is the type of person who would not let me attend dd's events if we were not together) - he said he was unsure because he didn't know how it was going to pan out with us.
I don't like the fact that my R's with them depend on my R with him - he would always let them come here to my home, in fact, he asks that, but when it comes to their education, plays, events, socials etc he has basically completely phased me out in the past.
I told him that I didn't particularly like this.
He said it was because he was scared I'd get depression and then not be able to handle them. I said I don't have that anymore and that was 3 years ago and I didn't want to live in the past.
He said he knew that but he was scared and wanted to make sure he is doing the right thing and not get hurt. I squeezed his hand and said I know.
Then he said he'd talk some more on Monday and smiled at me again.
Any opinions, anybody? How am I doing? Throw me an anchor!
