Thanks - re the cheery and upbeat problem, if you surround yourself with friends, go out to dinner, to the movies etc then it will be easier to be cheerful as I always found it easier to be cheerful when in the company of others and when I had depression, the severity was always much less when I was with friends or doing things.
Thanks for the hug. I'm sure I'll be ok when I've had some space. It was just the thing with changing our dd's name and not being invited to the birthday party and I DID iron it out with H successfully but I had all my dd's with me the last couple of days (5 people in a 2 bedroom box) and they were running around fighting and I kept thinking of H contradicting me etc and the birthday party and I just felt like a pressure cooker waiting to explode.
When H came to get them he said I seemed a bit on edge and I just said nothing. Got their stuff and waved them off, not a word to him.
This is why I think it's time to go dark as I will push him away with that behaviour.
