Sorry - I wasn't sure if people were supposed to start new threads for new subjects or not. I am on a parenting site as well and you have to start new threads or the moderators get annoyed
I suppose I could just broach the subject when he visits on Saturday and say, look it doesn't have to be an actual deadline, but I want to be open about it soon as actually I find it quite a strain (my 2 best female friends know).
The kids don't know and his friends don't know so if I go round there I have to act as if we are 'divorced' (well, we are but he's still my partner).
He's always been terribly concerned what other people think - especially now the big D is through - and he's terrified of his mother (she IS really scary) so I can only imagine the atomic fall-out when they realise we are dating. I am guessing that may be why it is a 'secret', also that it keeps him from having to make a proper decision so he can 'have' me but not have me, iykwim.
I want this issue out the way so I can carry on DB'ing. I will just try to be gentle and hope no damage was done.
I know what you say is right about the kids, I should just try to focus on now instead of remembering what happened and that is quite difficult. I am hoping things have settled down on that front and we should at least be able to raise our kids.
