I have been trying to decide whether I should come to piecing yet. It seems like a lot of things have to happen to be here and I'm not sure if it's time yet but I'm going to give it a try.
My and H and I don't live together but we our relationship has become the best it has been in years. We have been married 91/2 years and separated for 10 months.
I've been a little anxious lately cuz he has had some things in his life he had to deal with and he totally focuses on that. When that happens I tend to take it personally and start trying to grab for the "rope" like I might drowned if I don't.
So I must continue to work on that insecurity issue. It really bugs him. I even gave myself another one of my artificial deadlines before V Day. I didn't expect much, but I decided that if he didn't acknowledge it then I was going to take a break from him. I don't know if I would've gone through with it. However, on V Day he was still busy dealing with his issue, but he did say he would see me that day. He flies by the seat of his pants a lot so doesn't always plan things ahead of time, which I am working on dealing with where he is concerned. He called at 6:30 and said lets go have dinner, no reservations or anything and I really knew that was how he would do it so I was ok. We went to our favorite place that is little known right now so we had no problem getting in anyway. He also gave me a cute snuggly stuffed dog and the most beautiful card that made me teary eyed. It was actually "To my Loving Wife".
For the longest time he didn't refer to me as his wife, just introduced me by name.
So I've been holding on to that for the past couple of days and rereading the card that says what I know he can never say himself but I know he means it.
So, I want to be piecing--things have been getting better ever so slowly and I am working hard at this. So I hope I'm in the right place. I think I need to journal more too, so I can keep track of things better.
