What happens now?

[ValerieA]

I have seriously considered dropping the calls issue, but what's very troubling to me is when I asked him on Feb. 7th (could've been the 8th) when was the last time he had talked to OW. H said it was the past Thursday or Friday which would have been the 3rd or 4th, H said there would be no more contact, and he said that was the truth. H claims he was only calling OW back to tell her to stop calling him. BUT, as I found out, he called OW on the 6th before 1am while we were in Reno. I want to know the purpose of that call! He had NO incoming calls at all that day, so the "she called me first" excuse is out the window. H did call OW before on the 3rd as he said he did, but this call is questionable, too. It was actually a series of 3 calls, one right after the other. It was as if his signal kept dying so he kept calling back, or possibly OW could have been upset with H and kept hanging up on him for which reason he continued calling her back. Who knows? Then of course there's the 2 incoming calls which were after 2am and while he was in Seattle and Portland just 2 weeks ago. I know it wasn't me calling him!

H was going through many uncertainties while he was in Seattle/Portland about us and our R, but decided he didn't want to call it quits by the time he got home. During our convo about trying for a couple months and evaluating things after the first month, I reminded H that any and all contact with OW had to stop - no excuses! H agreed and said it had stopped when he said it did (on the 3rd or 4th).

Like I said at the beginning of this post, I have considered just dropping it..........but can you understand why I'm really having trouble with that? He lied. The deception is still there. How am I supposed to rebuild our M and the trust that goes along with it when there's still this wall of secrecy obstructing my view? And if I do ask H if any contact has been made by OW or himself without bringing up my evidence, and he were to say "no, not at all", then what? How do I handle that? I know I won't lash out and accuse him of lying (although he would be lying). That got me nowhere last time.

Thanks for listening.