Any fellow DBer's with some advice? Seriously, what should I do? Before I was DBing because of OW, now what I start all over because he says "INILWY"?

Not that I want my H to change, but there are somethings that NEED to change because its part of being married. I think my H wants to be married, but wants to keep me on a long string ...far enough away so that he doesnt have to feel bad about trying to be "single" too. What I mean by that is by having a single social life. NEVER including me!

I just want to do something to hurt him like he's hurt me. I know, bad karma and not good to even be thinking, but I am tired of him not respecting my feelings when it comes to this. Any man in this world would be so lucky to be treated as well as I treat him. Is it my codependency that is letting him treat me badly? And if it is, how do I stop it? How can I put my foot down w/out issuing an ultimatum?

H moved me 2 states away from all my friends and family and now, he has a social life, because he went to college out her once, but I have no one. We have only been here 4 years and I work from my home, so not much of a chance of meeting new people. I have couple friends out here, but they dont usually want to do anything. I am a very social person, I love to go out, have some drinks, go dancing...but here, I never get to do that and yea, it makes me unhappy.

So do I just sit back and wait? What should I do?? I wake up in the morning and just want to cry! Its just like it was a year ago, when the affair was going on!!

I guess after all of that I could try to post some positives:
1. H tried to lighten the mood after our little disagreement by joking around with me.
2. H and I went to see Amytiville...I held his arm because it was so intense and he had his hand on my leg.
3. H helped me work on softball shirts.
4. H did lots of cleaning around house to help me and right when I asked him to.

So those should make me feel better, right? Not sure they do, because like I said, could be just the "roommate" stuff he's doing.

Sorry to be such a bummer...I just dont know how to get out of this slump!! Wish I could go away for a week!!!