I was just thinking last night...it has been quite a while since I have shown my H any affection. We have both been sick, so been keeping kisses away so we both can get better...but hugs?? Why cant I give hugs when we are sick?
I guess I am realizing why it so much easier for my H to go without any type of affection...when we go so long, the need kind of disappears. But that is a BAD THING! We both need affection in our M to show our love for each other, or to at least keep us bonded and close. We have gotten out of practice of it being a "daily thing" that its just easier not to do it...
So, since this is something I want to work on, I am going to bring it up to my H tonight...yes, tonight..no waiting, just gonna say it. I am going to tell him that I havent been doing so well at showing him affection and that its something that I want to work on, because I feel it is an important aspect in our M. This being said, then I will ask him to help me with this....by at least one time a day, I would like to hug him. See, this way I am not asking him to change, its me that wants to change...
I think that after time, it will be something that we wont have to "conciously" put forth effort in doing anymore....it will just come naturally.
When I think back to before "the bomb" happened, and the things we used to do: pet names, kiss each morning before H left for work, hugs all the time, hand holding, etc. I want to get those things back. But I am finding out that I am still uncomfortable doing them, because it has been so long (almost 2 yrs) since we have done any of those things, thats is almost uncomfortable. Kind of ironic, I thought it was my H that needed to work on this stuff..when really, its probably both of us.
