Sorry to hear about H's grandfather. You did the right thing and were there for him. That is what a wife and a friend would do. I know you are not sure how to act sometimes. I feel that way too. Normally I would hug and kiss H everyday, now I dont. I want to but dont because it doesnt feel like he wants that from me right now. Just keep being a friend and doing as you have been doing. I admire how well you are doing and am trying to get to that place too.
