I think I may have been locked out. Couldn't reply on my old thread. Heard alot about being locked out on the board, never really sure what it meant. Now I do.
Last night and today so far have been pretty good.
H is acting "normal" talking, joking. Not going to question it, just go with the flow for now.
I am cleaning up the kitchen and he comes in and asks have you done any Valentine's shopping? I just looked at him for a moment. I was shocked and speechless. Where did that come from? Well, I recovered and said, I got the kids their cards for school. Pause here, then. Is that what you mean? Another pause. I finally said, I didn't figure we were going to buy each other anything. No comment from him. I guess he didn't want to be presentless if I had gotten him something. I know there is not a desire for him to buy me anything romantic at this point. Not going to pretend either. I have no expectations for Valentine's Day.
I did buy him a silly card I will leave for him tomorrow. I did not tell him this though. My birthday was in December. He bought me some presents and a card. The card was very disappointing and hurt. I don't want that again. Mine is just silly and to make him smile. I don't want him to be force to buy me something even a card if he doesn't want to. I will know and it will hurt.
So...I am working on putting H and ow out of my head for tomorrow. I want to ask what did you get ow. I am working on not doing that, though.
I wish I could just skip tomorrow. Unfortunately, I will have 20 little first graders with me tomorrow who will be all excited about Vday and talking about it. So putting the day out of my head is impossible. Will work on putting ow and H out of my head.
