I see your point about trying to find out why I am not attracted to him. H is not a bad guy in anyway, he is a great dad and good provider. I am just not seeing him as a lover anymore. One thing when I think back to what attracted me to him was he was so assertive and confident. I really felt taken care of when I was around him. I knew that if I needed something he was always there to support me. Now, I feel like I am the dominant one in our marriage. I make all the decisions and hold a lot of the responsibility and I'm not always comfortable with it. I don't know how it happened but over time it did. I think I have lost a lot of my confidence in him. Sometimes, I wonder if there were truly a crisis would he step in and handle it. For example, last year I had to make the decision to have surgery or not (not life threatening, just something that would make me more comfortable). I opted not to have the surgery because I didn't have the confidence that he would help me out during my recovery. The only thing I can base future behavior on is past behavior and he has let me down before so until I see a pattern on consistancy, I will have my doubts.
So, in six years he went from being someone who went out and got what he wanted to this "nice guy" who lets the world lead him around. I guess I just don't respect him much. That is such a terrible thing to say.
So maybe not respecting him as a man has led me to not feeling attracted to him?
