Quote: partly because I'm telling the part of the truth that the rest of y'all aren't telling.
I have to say I'm dead curious to know what you meant by this.
Well, I think both of the following statements are equally true:
1. Not having sex is a major bummer.
2. There are other things in life that are more important than sex, despite what our obsessed culture seems to preach. Love, maturity, and stable families come to mind.
I think all y'all are doing an adequate job of preaching #1, so I don't have to. I've been focussing more on #2. But not having sex will always hurt, and hurt bad. I do feel like I'm going to explode much of the time. I'm doing a *lot* of running, which seems to help. I've never found a shower cold enough to make a difference. And there are plenty of times that I'm talking to a woman, and I realize that I'm looking at her like a hungry man looks at a chocolate cake. Sigh.
At first I can't imagine living without sex - then I remind myself about what's more important, what my commitments are, that I'm not going to go out and have an affair, that I'm not going to get a divorce and find another wife, that these other things are more important. It takes discipline.
Quote: After I started taking a strong stand on the sex issue my H once said to me "I'm actually kind of relieved to find out that there is something that would make you want to leave our relationship.". Have you ever given your W reason to believe that you would be okay without her? Sometimes the love that seems to make you strong is really the crutch that keeps you weak or the cage that keeps you trapped.
I simply don't believe that sex is more important than my commitment to my wife, our children, and our marriage. Which is saying a lot about the importance of that commitment.
