Jon, I don't know...I've never been tempted to go to the other side, but I'm not sure I would proclaim myself lesbian simply because I found women sexually stimulating.
I find naked women MUCH more stimulating than men..and my fantasies always contain another woman in some capacity...but I am not lesbian. I would never want a relationship with a woman, not even a purely sexual one. I am hetero all the way, but women play a big part in my fantasy sex life.
I'm not trying to suggest that your wife is wrong about herself, just saying that sexual fantasy material does not make you anything, it's just what arouses you. I like all the things your wife said, but I don't have any urge to actually follow through with it.
