You need to get out of this marriage. This is a BB for people who are trying to be more or less hopeful about fixing a SSM. I don't think any of us would advise you that you should be more or less hopeful about fixing a physically abusive relationship. I don't care if you smoke crack, haven't cleaned the house in a year and are currently sleeping with your H's brother and eight of his cousins. It is NOT YOUR FAULT. NOBODY has the right to hit you and you should LEAVE NOW because your worst case scenario is very scary.
"Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?" - Mary Oliver
