I do try and take care of my needs, in a material way, but I am talking more about moral, physcological, and social support. That kind of needs to come from the outside. Although I have taken to giving myself some pep talks, some positive self-talk from time to time.
Anyway, some more jounaling.
Yesterday, when H rang he told me there was eight inches of snow up in the hills around his place. This morning we awoke with the same down here in the city. After walking D to school through the snow, I rang H to tell him.
I figured he is the one who always rings me, unless I ring him about logistics/D etc. This has been the case for more than a year. So I thought I would ring him just for a chat, as I know he gets a bit lonely there on his own, especially in this weather.
When he picked up the phone and heard it was me, I could hear the surprise in his voice. I hope it was pleasant surprise. I told him about the snow, and he was amazed, it doesn't usually snow too much down here in the city, or just sort of sleety snow which turns to mush in a trice.
Then H got to talking about his work and his favourite films and I was treated to his thoughts about things for the next 20 minutes!
I think I need to pick up the phone to chat to him now and again, to deposit some postive feelings for me in the bank. Feelings of warm friendship. But I shouldn't overdo it at this point.
One thing H mentioned was that though the winter is still hard to bear up at his place, he is not in a bad way like last year. He has mentioned more than once that psychologically, he was really bad last year, while this year he is much better. Interesting. He seemed pretty keyed up to me a number of times around Christmas and before...
Livnlearn
"The unexamined life is not worth living" - Socrates
