I guess that is where I am at. I ask him to leave when I am very emotional or very angry. Usually afterwards I am glad that he doesn't. These last few days have been a little different though. I can't seem to let go. I am angry or very sad. I seem to be moving towards forcing the issue with H and OW. My hold up is of course the kids and how I will handle it. I am a teacher and am not sure how I will cope once H goes. My plan was to wait until spring break and see where we were. If it was the same, then I was going to force the issue and make H choose. I would have a week to not deal with work and maybe pull myself together. Spring break seems like a long way off, too far off. I am also scared if I force and he chooses OW that I will not be able to take him back when the A fizzles. By that point the kids will know, our family and friends will know. Right now no one knows except for one very close friend.
My other issue is ML (if you can call it that, we do the deed but I wouldn't say it is ML). H initiated a few quickies in the beginning but has not recently. I picked up the ball and have initiated most since. That was one of the problems in M. H felt he did not get it enough. So that became one of my 180's. I know when we ML, his heart is not in it. Don't get me wrong, he does enjoy it, he does what men do. But he hardly touches me. I have had doubts whether I should continue. My other fear is that if I stop, he will turn to OW for physical too. But it is the one 180 I have not backslid on. Any advice on this one?
Still trying to sort things out. I appreciate all the advice and support. Sherry
