HM. It's a little annoying that he's coming across as saying he can get in trouble for what you said--not what he did. There's not much you can do when he's still in this phase... And it is a phase. You can agree with him that what you say/said can affect him without necessarily taking the blame for it.
Quote: What a crappy day. I am so sick of it. I could have been through all of this, why did I let him come home? I am so tired of being in limbo wondering what is going to happen next. What if all this hurt is for nothing? Sometimes I wonder if its just easier to close this chapter of my live and start a new book. Does anyone else out there feel like I do?
Yes. I noticed the feeling came up less and less, though, as time went on. One of the things that helped me, was to start creating new, fun memories together.
Quote: I know I should be happy my H brought me flowers, why does it depress me? I said thank you but, I just don't feel like it means that much. Part of the problem is I know all the money H spent on his A. He bought jewelry, clothes, trips you name it.
Sounds like your H is a gifts person.
But...at least he did make the gesture. It's a start, even if it seems small. Make sure to thank him and let him how great it was/how happy it made you/how much you loved it. That way, you are more likely to increase that behavior.
(And, yes, it's normal to feel this way, too.)
Quote: I am so sick of hearing, he is doing the right thing and that he is home. Well isn't that just great for him, he is doing the right thing, what a sacrifice on his part. Do you ever hear anyone say, wow, you are so incredibly awsome to be able to take H back after he purt your life through hell for the last 18months! Hell no you don't, they say crap like aren't you so glad he is home.
Hey, I think you are awesome for sticking this through and letting him come home.
And, BTW, this is also something I went through, as well. Besides...these are probably the same people who didn't want you to fight for your M. It's not their R, so try not to let them bother you so much.
