She still doesn't want to own her sexual feelings. She wants to make it All About Dave.
He is reacting badly to that, and he should.
What does being married have to do with it? I am guessing that if she had initiated that way prior to marriage, they may not have made it this far!
It's one thing if your spouse wants to give you a gift of being willing (but not overly wanting) but it MUST be packaged in a kind way or it aint a gift.
If I am standing in the kitchen saying to H, "Do you want me to clean these dishes so that you aren't mad in the morning?", I doubt he is going to feel all warm and fuzzy inside, kwim.
