Back on Track

[BeingMe]

You are in dangerous territory by bringing up separation all the time, but I know how hard it is not to. I did a couple of times, saying "perhaps we should end it instead of being dead in the water", and H said the other day, that he got thinking that maybe that is a good idea, and it was he who finally said he wants the divorce. However, that was after telling me he had lied about being back in love with me, so I can only assume that the EA has been ongoing and that he lied when he said he realized that it was a passing infatuation. I have since done a little research on the internet about old flames getting back together, and it apparently burns hotter, and longer, and if they marry, has a good chance of surviving. So, I came to the conclusion that I was just fighting a losing battle. That, I had wasted 20 years of my life on a someone who, in the final analysis, didn't think I was worth fighting for.

I move on, and I do admit, I have a lot of bravado, am scared to be on my own, but there are plenty of fish in the sea. Maybe, I'll meet someone who will appreciate me and not be hankering after someone from high school.

I am rambling now, so I will stop.