Back on Track

[BeingMe]

I doubt it, Slowly. Although, who knows. I am done, but still have to rely on H financially, so what can I do, but stay in the house with him and children until we sell it next year.

Last night I read an article on people who regain contact with old sweethearts (usually from school) and the feelings it re-ignites in them is almost euphoric, and they are above-normal happy with each other. Apparently, even if your M is strong, this kind of connection is very likely to lead to an affair. What little research has been done, seems to indicate that if a marriage results from their affair, it has a 72% chance of surviving. So, what hope does the LBS have? Not much! I have felt like it was bashing my head against a wall with my H since this woman came back into his life (they knew each other in high school, but only went on one date - my H was shy, but always fantasized about her throughout high school). One man who was interviewed, even said that as much as he cares for his wife, it feels like she was just an interruption until he was reunited with his high school sweetheart. This, after 28 years of marriage. WTF! This is exactly how I felt when my H and OW were talking about how they wished they had had children together, and had married, etc. Wishing our life together and our children away. What am I then? Just the practice run! I cried all night last night, realising that I had wasted 20 years of my life on someone who is this fickle and shallow. He now wants to be friends. Ha! That's what you say to someone you've been dating for a little time, not to someone you've been married to for 20 years! He's bloody crazy! And, I hope he doesn't think that I will have anything to do with his virtual slut.

But, I will get over this, and move on with my life, and I will live it well. I choose this! I will not allow them to ruin me. I will get a career, meet someone else who truly love me (perhaps in time), experience new things, meet and make lots of new friends, and enjoy my children.