Wendy, thanks for posting again today! I'm quite the mess - disappointed with myself for such a display of emotion, I mean, really! Hurling papers at someone? Screaming? Totally out of character. Nice to have friends around me, being so supportive. We leave a week from today. I want to think about what you've said about your boundaries regarding OW and your H. I wonder if a reframe might be in order, since controlling is definitely an issue and your H will at some point probably rebel against it.
Anne, thank you SO much for the very simple reminder: Act As If. Yes! You are so right - acting as if we are NOT, in fact, on fragile ground. Something along the lines of what Betsey and GBO and H2H are telling me, that the therapy is for US as a team, and it is to find ways to communicate and to heal our wounds together, making our bonds stronger, not a forum in which to point fingers and accuse. Us against the world, act as if we are bonded and strong.
Yes, yes, yes. Thank you. I had totally left that one behind.
BTW, to clarify, Anne, I don't think she's pursuing and disrespecting our R now, but she was before, when she knew we were together and he was unhappy. She opened the door wide and put on her best behavior, and called in the middle of the night with a soft voice, and plugged in her nefarious connectors. ~~*
[Ha! Sage, I love this, too. I'm experimenting - which do you like better? This one is like rivers and then a splat.]
Still no word on the therapy, but I did manage to straighten out my healthcare crap and get a physical therapist for my neck-ometriosis. Tomorrow I see a chiro, one for whom I've waited two weeks for an appointment.
I go over to S's in two hours, and if I can get through planning our trip without dissolving into R talk and pelting him with killer banana peels or the like because he didn't call a therapist, then I'll be one-up.
~~*
