I've been lurking and waiting patiently. Where's the book?
I have read all your posts and I so identify with what you say. I picture NOPkin as a caped crusader; complete with tights and a cape. There's a big A on the chest with a line through it, like the no smoking sign!
I might be the one who gets the prize for the longest SSM. 33yrs and counting. Admittedly, it would be a booby prize! My experience is that it never gets any better and my heartfelt and worthless advice to those of you who are not yet committed to your sexless significant others is simple. Pack your panties and run! Like the wind!
It's too late for me to follow my own advice. I am old now. If we split up over this it's not likely I would ever find anyone else. So, I would just end up sex starved and poor. I have never had an affair of the head or the heart. I have been the most loyal(or stupid) person I know. In a last-ditch effort to change things, I told my husband I had no intention of dying without having sex and I would have oral sex at least once before I tipped over. I got his standard response that things would get better and we would work on it. Yeah. Right. Sure. IN WHAT DECADE? Yup, I am old, bitter, and angry. With myself more than anyone else.
My apologies to NOPkin but if I ever have the opportunity to have an affair, I will. Everyone deserves sex a few times in their life and I'm just human too. I even told my husband in advance.
So why did I stay married all these years? Other than his sex/intimacy issues, my husband is a wonderful man. People think we have a perfect marriage. We have traveled and seen the world. We are the best of friends. We enjoy each other's company. But for me, it's not enough. Should it be enough?
I don't think my husband has ever wanted sex. We once spent 2 weeks in Tahiti, the most romantic place on the planet. No phone, no TV, no computer, no work. No sex either! What's it like to be wanted and desired? I'll probably never know.
My best wishes to all of you. I hope you are successful and happy.
