Hello everyone~I have been reading this thread on and off for most of the day. I feel so thankful to have found this board and to see that I am not alone in this horrible situation. I am a HDW and my LDH is/has been that way for a long time. We have also been married for a little over 25 years and I have dealt with his desire gradually decreasing over time. To be fair to him~I have had some health problems but, nothing that would interfere with a good sex life. He has me wondering all the things you have mentioned here~is he gay? having affairs, asexual? I only wish I knew so I could address the elephant in the room. I have tried just about everything to reach out to him, to initate sex, to try to be attractive to him. To the point of literally embarassing myself. But; nothing but rejection and being left feeling worthless, unlovable and unattractive. I have and am considering an affair knowing that it is morally wrong~but I am longing to be held, loved, and made to feel like the sensual woman that I am. There is no chance of that happening with DH. I have suggested counseling ad he refused so I am now going on my own! I have suggested a retreat for marriages in trouble in our church~again, no. I've even asked him outright if he has someone else and he just acts like~how dare I ask him that!! I posted over on the infidelity thread and recieved some good f/b but, I'm not sure that the folks over there "get it" the way you all do here. I don't want to end my marraige, but if this continues on and on ~along with the emotional neglect and abuse (which is a whole different discussion)~I don't know what will happen. I love my DH but because of his isolation and neglect; it has been a long time since I have felt "in love" with him. I would love any f/b from those of you who have walked this path and YES!! I would love a book to address this issue. Thanks and Best of luck to you all.
