I think that, in my H's case, he has a hard time seeing the infinite possibilities because he is so inundated with what he "doesn't have". Meaning, an excess of desire. The messages he receives daily (from his coworkers, from television, etc) are that men have an excess of desire. So when he doesn't feel that way, all he can focus on is what he doesn't have--not the possibilities.
Wives who have a lower sex drive are not receiving the same types of messages, day in and day out. That ALL of the other wives out there are sex maniacs, etc. So I am not surprised that, in general, the wives are more apt to think of other possibilities--they have been conditioned to just know that their mates sex drive will outstrip theirs and that there will be a need to provide something in the interim.
