Tag- I see what you are saying about H getting help. As of now, he has no one I guess. He relies on talking to me, and me opening up to him to help him. He isn't a reader, but has agreed to read books that I reccomended once I agree to open up to him. As far as counseling or the Retrouville, I haven't mentioned anything. Years ago we tried MC and it was a bad experience for both of us.
I know that was just your input and I really appreciate it. I hope you don't think I was getting angry or snippy, it may have come through that way and I apologize if it did.
So, I got a phone call to work tonight and cover for someone. H knew that I was trying to get some extra hours at work. Instead of taking the time, I decided to stay home and have that talk with H that he waiting for. It won't be easy, since I am such an introvert, but I have to do it. I have settled on what I think I need from him: 1) Building up trust again- I need him to be honest and forthcoming with me. Somethings can't be proven, I will just have to take him at his word (this will take time) but if I don't believe him, instead of getting upset, show me instead of trying to convince me and understand that this will just take some time. 2) Spending time with me- Instead of cleaning the garage, or whatever the project be- take time to sit and talk with me, cuddle with me and watch a movie....anything. 3) Listen to me when I talk and tell me if he doesn't understand me. Understanding me is huge. 4) Talk to me. About anything. How your day went, etc. 5) Notes. He always used to leave me little I love you notes around the house, or buy me cards, things like that showed me he was thinking of me.
I guess that's really all I can think of for now. I am sure that with time my needs will change. But for now, this is what I found when I dug deep.
