[sage]

Hi Frankly,

thanks again for your visit to my thread! It's great that you and your w have come back together after her ea...I am sorry that you guys are both going thru a rough time right now though I suppose it is to be expected after all you have been through.

My first reaction is that perhaps both you and your w are trying to hard to regain feelings. I'm not trying to be glib but I picture the two of you watching a pot, waiting for it to boil. Or, perhaps a more apt analogy would be that you both keep pulling the turkey out of the oven to see if it is done...you do know how long it takes to cook a turkey that way, right?

SO...my suggestion is ACTION. What makes you guys feel good together? What makes you laugh? What makes you feel energetic? Start DOING stuff together and I suspect the FEELING will follow along.

How about some funny movies?

I think you mentioned in one of your threads that you've been losing weight -- how about exercising with her? Walking? Hiking? Playing golf?

A day trip into town for a museum? Go see some sports? Any things on the list of things that either of you have been wanting to do but you haven't?

Now, don't go rushing headlong into all of these things at once because that can seem awfully pursuing...suggest a movie and a walk this week? Map out a half day trip? Something along those lines.

Also, if w isn't in the mode to say "yes" right now, you might plan to do these things anyway...bring home a super funny video or go out for a brisk walk -- you'll come back energized and that will impact her, I'll bet!

I'd also suggest not embarking on any "temperature taking R talks" for the near future (like weeks, months!). Just spend some time together doing fun things.

What do you think?

Sage