JPB, Thanks for words of encouragement. I definitelly feel much better about the place I'm in than I had in a long time. I still can't believe that I'm loosing a person that I thought was the love of my life but I guess I was wrong about what that R meant. I'm starting to think more and more about the single life and even though I'm still scared there is also a lot of anticipation in my thoughts.
kml, I see your point. So far he is taking the meds (3 days now?) and I hope he continues for his own sake.
sun, If I can get my feelings in check and be able to love his as a human being/friend only I really want to have him in my life. I'm a bit scared that once I move out/D is final he might still want to have occasional physical R - it often happens when there is so much confusion. I want to make sure that things are clear though - if he is planning on attempting to build a new R with possible re-marrying than we would have to start as a whole new couple - dating first and then progressing to being physical again. If he wants F only then there will be no sex (it will be damn hard because I crave him but I got to be strong so I don't do damage to myself...and him coming to think of it).
Last night before leaving for home I called to let him know I'm on the way, he told me that he picked up a stalker on his commute back from the city. Some big, scary guy has been following him for couple of months now when he gets to Port Authority. He is getting really nervous about it and he was sharing that with me.
Once I got home he took the car to go over to arts and crafts store, when he came back he told me that he had something for me - he picked up frames for my collage pieces - very sweet.
Before going to bed we talked a bit about my meeting at work that I'm having today (the future of my clinic will be decided soon), he said that if something drastic happens to give him a call - I'm not planning on doing it.
Read Cainercast for him and me, he appeared to think that his was right on the money.
Oh! I also have an appt with the original C (the one we went to for MC that I thought was a waste of time and now realized that she actually helped ME a lot so I'm giving it another try) for tomorrow AM. SBXH knows because she called to confirm it as he was sitting right next to me. No comments other than when I mentioned thinking about going back to her he said that he thought I didn't like her.
