After reading your post I have to agree with how WAS is feeling about infedility and affair. I think that you are right. When my H decided that he was no longer in love with me and that he was unhappy the natural thing for him to do was move on...in his mind. But for the betrayed spouse it is hard to fatham that there are no more feelings between the two. I still believe that no matter how unhappy you think you are in a relationship it doesnt justify cheating. If you are unhappy then do something about it, then once seperated or divorced then you are free to seek outside R, but until then it is still wrong. I can see how the S might view it otherwise tho. I have told my H that I dont blame him for having feelings for someone else, I think sometimes people can fall prey to someone else boosting their ego, etc, but I do blame him for not stopping it while he is supposedly trying to work things out with me. I am toying with D, because I just dont see H ever stopping R with his OW. But I am lost and confused and am not sure of what I feel anymore.
Trying to make the best of the situation while H is at home with me but is getting very hard. I am not allowed to talk about how I feel, say my opinion on what is going on or question him about OW without him getting mad and threatening divorce. So my answer to him now is, Please get the divorce and let me go, because you are holding on to me and not letting me move on. But he still doesnt do it. I just dont get it!
Has your H pursued the D? Are any papers filed? Do you still live with him (I apologize I dont remember).
