I've followed your threads and your responses on other threads and you are to be commended for some of your advice and for stepping up and trying to make your relationship better.
I do have an observation or two and wanted to at least throw it out there for some food for thought.
One thing you reitterate over and over is that communication is key to any relationship. On this, I totally agree.
What I have noticed with you though is it seems like when you communicate with your H, sometimes he says things and you don't hear him. You get offended by what he just said and you just don't hear what he is saying because he didn't frame it the way you would like.
A while back, I read something from you where your H in the morning, asked for a BJ before he went off to work, you took great pride in yourself by standing up to him and saying, "What's in it for me?"
You get very offended when you climb in to bed after him and he bluntly asks you for a BJ.
Your H at times has tried seducing you and you think that is ridiculas because, "you're a sure thing".
Your H comes out the other day and tells you, "our sex life sucks", "you control our sex life".
For some reason though, you don't hear him. You may not feel you control your SL, but your H obviously feels you do. Do you ever ask yourself why he feels that way?
Although what your H did was rude, for that one instant he was in control. You absolutely hated it. How did you put it? Volcano angry.
Someone said a while back, their SL was leftover S. take out everything the spouse would not do and what you have left is the leftovers.
I think your H has been telling you he wants some spontaneity, want to sometimes be able to make a request that seems a little over the top and have it be fullfilled. Kind of a fantasy come true. I'd even venture that he'd probably get pretty turned on by you making some over the top request of him.
