Regarding having your needs met..I really think this is a process and not a one-time conversation. My H obviously knows that my LL is physical touch.
But do you know that I still have to remind him (gently and with humor) at least twice per week? You COULD call this being the keeper of the R, but I choose to reframe this as a little on the job training. This is counterintuitive to him so I have to keep reminding him and giving him positive reinforcement. My guess is that you will have to do the same with your H. When an opportunity comes up in which my H could be meeting a need of mine, I have been saying "you know...now would be a good time for you to touch me..." My tone of voice is critical in these moments. I keep it light and funny and he responds well.
At his heart he just wants to please me.
I have a hunch that your husband is exactly the same way.
