I feel for ya, hd, I really do. I'd be interested in answers to this part of my earlier post
Quote:

At some point, hd, you have to ask yourself (and I'm sure you have) what does "saving the marriage" look like? At its BEST, how close did this marriage ever come to the R you want? I don't mean how close did it come to the R of your dreams, your fantasy R, but how close to a reasonably happy, practical, livable R? And how long did that period last?