finished reading the five love languages this morning. Wow. I wish I would have found that book a long time ago. There is so much help out there, but so many of us find it too late. That book was $12.99, but it is priceless to me now cause I know what happened to us cause we just didn't know , and I am gonna make damn sure I will NEVER have that happen to me again.The Divorce Remedy was great too, but I am having a little more difficulty with it cause H is not here to DB on, and he never really calls any more. After all is said and done it all comes down to we had some major comunication problems, going way back to the beginning. And it didn't change when we got remarried. I am so sad that I will not have any chance to do anything with the info now.I do know this divorce is going to happen, it has to, my H has too much invested in his anger, in convincing himself that I am guilty for sins past and the cause of all his unhappiness, and of course in OW and all the support,love and care he has given her .To stop that all right now and want to reconcile with me would really make him look foolish , and he hates looking foolish or being wrong , so... I will work on filling out the rest of the divorce forms today, so that when he does want them, I will have 'em ready. I still do NOT want this to happen, especially since I know that if he wanted to it could be repaired, with some effort on both our parts. Oh well, the sooner he and OW get started on their new lives together, the sooner the euphoria of the "in love" phase will wear off. I do think they have some considerable drama ahead of them with HER divorce, cause her H has filed that counter motion re: child support and whatever.Plus, I know my H is probably not interested in finding out what her love language is , so they may have a tough time down the road. I don't know anything about her, 'cept what H told me, but I do not think she will want to put H before her kids for long. And once he does not have to protect her from her H, it'll be interesting to see what their relationship will be based on.When there is no major drama, what will feed their need to cling to each other?All she'd have to do is tell one little lie, and she would be doomed. I am sure she is attractive, and they must have something in common, or else my H would not be hanging around and enduring this drama. I realize that sometimes these things do work out for people ,and maybe he just wants something totally different from what he had with me.I do know he cares for her, loves her.But now I also know that if she does not learn his love language, this may not last for them, I keep remembering LOSTIN FL and her sitch. Her H moved 400 miles away, told anyone that would listen that he was happy with OW,etc. And he came home. But they had kids, I have no ties to my H, now that the dog is gone. Plus I have to actually put a copy of the vet bill in the mail tomorrow cause H said he would split the cost of the cremation of our dog, and I still have not seen any money.I texted him when I got the dog back saying "he's home" he textd back "pet him for me" so that should have jogged his memory, right? That why I am slightly nervous about believing him about giving me what I want money wise from the house sale. Well, if he doesn't I can always refuse to sign the sale papers,right? Thanks for letting me vent some, I am just still so sad that this is all coming to pass. I did not/ do not want to lose my H. I still love him.I would give anything to have another chance to work on our marriage.I don't like how he has treated me during this, and I know that I would never want to be treated like that again. I will still try to DB,and start applying the love languages info I learned -if I ever get to see him again for more than 5 minutes.And if I don't- I am starting to feel that I have learned so much here and reading the books that I will be ok to lead us into a better realtionship should he ever want to come back, or if not I will be better in a new realtionship with someone who will want to learn my love language too.
