Cemar: I asked that question only to illustrate the difference between what you, as an HD male and I as an HD female, are after. You want a wife who likes sex and will show enthusiasm when you have it.
Part of my wishes include having a man who's sex drive overwhelms my own. So your wife would need to go from point A to point M, say, in order for you to be happy. I need my H to go from A to..oh, about V. I need him to not only be willing and enthusiastic but to be a regular old horny guy who pursues me and wants more sex than I do! THAT is what I find sexy.
That is all I was trying to get at with the HDW dilemma. The guys do not expect their wives to ever surpass them, nor would they find that particularly sexy. Like you said, there would then be a little performance anxiety.
However, I just recently realized that this was part of my wishes. Up until then, I'd been fooling myself into thinking that I was wanting moderate changes. It wasn't until I owned up to wanting him to be hornier than me (that is what I find sexy) that I could see that this was unrealistic. Then I was able to grieve that loss a little and move on to a more realistic goal.
