MustangSally, I was touched by some of the things in your post. Yes, sometimes a person just wants to shout "How could you be so dumb and spend $33,000 on other women." I understand the feelings. I also wish your H could thank you for standing by him to save the M.
I am not the best person at setting and keeping goals so will just say the smaller the step the better they seem to work.
-------- I would really like to not let him see me break... ----------- It might do some good for your H to see you in pain because of the actions he took. That does not say you have to beat him over the head and point your finger at him saying what a bad boy he was. No, you can say you are worried about how all of this will work out. That way he knows what effects him also effects you.
Work on that goal list. Post a starter list. Others here will help you with it. Use the BB as a sounding board. The list does not have to be perfect.
