Caro: I wanted to chime in on a couple of points. First, I wanted to echo whoever commented on you not enjoying foreplay. You might want to do some introspection on why this is. Any abuse in your background? Not wanting to be touched in a sexual manner tends to point to some dark history...and if so, you need to deal with that. There are others here who are better than me about that sort of thing.
Second, I just want to put in my two cents about adoption. I know that there is a special bond between a mother and her child, but a bond forms between a mother and her adopted child, too. I have three kids from a prior marriage, and one kid my W and I adopted. They're all wonderful kids. There are so many children in the world who need moms and dads in their lives, you might want to investigate this. I was sitting next to a woman the other night who was talking with another lady about how she was going to Russia next month to adopt her second son from there. She said that she regretted going through all the fertility and in vitro procedures because it really tapped them out financially, and if they hadn't done that, she would be able to adopt more children. Yeah, I know I shouldn't have been eavesdropping but it's one of my favorite pasttimes.
I hope you are able to work through your problems and end up with a happy family all the way around.
