Quote: When we were having it out and H was asking me not to leave the day after his trip w/ow, I asked why he does this stuff, and risks our m/reconciliation/all our progress if it is what he wants--if he loves me and wants our M, WHY does he do this and risk it all? He just hung his head and bawled and said he made a mistake (this was in regard to the trip w/ow 2 weeks ago Wednesday) Everything else he seems to blame on me.
Deb- MHO on this...it plays right into his viewing you as his mother. All these questions sound like something a mother would ask her teenage son. His repy always being the infamous..."I don't knoooooooow". He probably really does not know much in that befuddled brain of his. You shooting a barage of questions/realizations his way is more than he can take on his best day, let alone in the heat of argument. Deb, your actions WILL speak louder than words.
I think you should call him on his BS but leave the third degree out of it. It's not going to get you anywhere. He needs to come to these conclusions on his own not have them pointed out by you. He will just resent you all the more for being right once again.
Try just living for you and son for the next couple of days. Forget about Friday for now. It will come whether or not you worry about it.
BTW- Your son seems smart, mature, sensitive enough to understand that mom needs a couple of days away. This does not have to be a scary situation for him...or you. The way in which it was presented to him was what scared him so badly (and understandably so).
