It is a bust so far to this extent - sex continues to be at my initiation on approximately a once per month schedule, his expressions of desire are fleeting at best.
Here is the part that isn't a bust - I wrote him a letter explaining how I felt and requesting a sex schedule. That ball is currently in his court. If he chooses not to set a schedule I have let him know that I will initiate based upon my own physical and emotional needs. His reaction will let me know how seriously he takes the M. In other words, I am taking responsibility for myself and my emotions and not getting them intermingled with his.
The other part that isn't a bust is that H knows there is a problem. We are seeing a C together. Also, we have a very good, very positive marriage in every other way.
It is a one step at a time process. I have just recently gotten whacked on the head enough to understand that the longer I keep being the relationship monitor, the more my H doesn't have to be responsible for himself. In fact, when I concentrate on monitoring I am not really being responsible to myself. I am setting the boundaries and trying to maintain confidence that I can do that and stay close with my H at the same time.
