Thanks Lou, for taking the time to write that out!
I hope it will help out in the future. Right now, I'm sort of just observing. H has been rather friendly the past few days. He's come out of his shell, spending more time with the kids, talked to me this morning. He pointed out his hands were shaking, said he hasn't been sleeping well. I said he should take care of himself, I've brought up a couple of times in the past couple of days the idea of him seeing a Dr. He's kind of 'laughed' it off. Told me this morning I took care of him very well.
I'm trying to notice how I respond to things, trying to just let things happen without reacting. I've realized that my 'disorganization' is probably a result of being so afraid of not doing everything 'expected' of me, sort of always looking over my shoulder, so that I end up not really paying attention to what I'm doing, and am never really doing what I want - always on someone else's schedule.
I found a new C, a psychiatrist here in town with a very good reputation. He sounded very nice on the phone, and was actually eager to get to use his English. He went out of his way to make a good amount of time available to me on Sun, so we could meet once before Christmas.
This has certainly been an interesting trip, and at this point, no matter what the outcome, I come out of it a lot stronger.
HD, good luck putting your boundaries in place. I hope the next year brings us both a lot more happiness.
