She is trying to make you feel awful about yourself so that you don't have time to focus on how you feel about HER.
Herpes vs. prostitutes.....hmmmmmmmmm. Yeah, I think I'd choose a few encounters from long ago rather than a permanent disease that you can pass to your husband or children (at birth)!!! That is horrible and she probably needs counseling because of it. Sounds like she never dealt with it.
My only advice to you is to say to her what Hairdog has said to his wife: I will not live in a sexless marriage.
Anything else and she is going to use hysteria to throw you off track.
You should pursue the counseling and if I were you, I would insist that she get some of her own--with or without you--as a condition for staying married.
Good luck to you and I'm terribly sorry to hear of your situation with your dad. I pray that he finds the strength to turn his life around. He has already lost his family and destroyed another one, with his actions. How sick. However, none of us are slaves to our heritage. It means nothing that he is in prison, in terms of what kind of man YOU will turn out to be.
Start working on yourself and fix those areas that need fixin. Read that book any old time you feel like it. Let her know what you will and will not tolerate in your marriage and then be willing to hear her side and follow it up with action.
