Where's my sick bag? Ride getting bumpy!

[Livnlearn]

This morning I went to the bank. I set up a standing order to pay H a portion of the mortgage (I couldn't pay it directly to the bank account as it is in his name, and although H could just pay me the child maintenance minus my mortgage contribution, I prefer it this way so there is a record of who has paid what).

I also found out about the penalites inolved in paying off the whole amount should I ever have the option of doing that.

I found out that H can take my name off his account on his own, by going to his bank branch in person.

I felt good having done this stuff, the money monkey isn't off my back but the H monkey is! And of course the money monkey is impersonal, and I have to face it, whereas H is an unpredictable as a rumbling volcano these days.

I got back home and was wondering when I should ring H about it. I decided to wait a little, wanted to prepare myself for the convo...

But meanwhile, H rang me. Firstly, he said, I am just ringing to say hi. ( that's a first!)

I replied, hi, you sound a bit better.

H said, yes, yesterday I felt so much better I went for a walk but after a while I was almost on my knees, I still need to recover a bit. W3 and her D were over here last night for dinner which was nice, I hadn't seen anyone for three days.

He thanked me for the card, said it was nice.

(Hmmm there is something to this validation.... I will post the words from the card here. It is something which H would normallly find too mushy and sentimental

"You're usually the one who gets things done, no matter what - even when most people would stop to rest...

But now that you're under the weather, I hope you take good care of yourself so that you can get better soon.

Not just because you are someone who is needed by so many, but because you're a special person who means so much to me."

And I added underneath, "Yes, really! Hope you get better soon, love Livnlearn"

Then he said, are you sending D up this weekend? (What? After he steam rollered me into agreeing to it anyway, why is he now asking? )

I replied, sure, if you want to have her. We then talked about warm clothes. He said, don't send too much stuff up. (Implying that I do.) I said, I will send up stuff for all eventualities, because it will be when I don't, that you will need her boots or whatever, and it will be uncomfortble to manage without them in the snow etc or rain. He agreed.

I told him about the standing order to his account. He said, why bother with all that, I can just pay you less. I said, the SS doesn't cost extra, and I prefer it this way.

He said he was coming down to city Tuesday next, and would sort out the bank work. I said, fine, I would be tied up in the morning, but that I had found out he could remove my name from the joint account without my presence (really in his name with me as a second signatory or something). He said, you keep the card and use it this month....

Folks, my H is so weird - when I offer to give him his card, he says no no, you keep it, later he accuses me of keeping his card and stealing his money... We have gone through this scenario twice now. Until he sets up his standing order to me, I will keep the card.

Says he will set up the SS next month, as this month he has very little coming in, he 'doesn't know why'. Perhaps because he hasn't invoiced much???

See, to H, his money problems are real, but he doesn't know why he has them; with me it is because I am sitting on my backside doing nothing.

Anyway, after all of that, he said, well then, that's it then. I said, OK then bye!

Livnlearn