Your patience and peace dealing with H's internet business flip-flopping is encouraging.
I'm wondering if H or his BPs should plant the "we might shut down" seed with BMOW? People are most defensive and reactive when they feel manipulated and that they don't have a choice. If H was direct with BMOW and simply said, "We haven't made a decision yet, but we are considering shutting this thing down, it might be in your best interest to find another man - I mean job..... "
If you shut down without telling her, she's surprised and upset. If you tell her first and then shut down, at least she isn't surprised, and may feel a little more control in the situation since she was given "warning".