Lou, thanks for the clarification... LTR material is Long term relationship material, ie someone you'd take seriously.

I am in my 40's, was married for 23 years. It's never been part of my agenda to use sex or the promise of sex, as leverage for something I wanted. Frankly, I usually just wanted the sex . It was the end, not the means to the end.

Naturally I have seen on TV the scenarios where women use sexuality for bargaining, I just had not thought of something that tacky and obvious being a practical reality. I thought of it like other implausible things you see on soap operas, and Desperate Housewives.

I think your reasons/situations in which you would not follow through on a woman fondling herself show that you are one of the good guys. They make sense, and show that you are able to think with the big head, even if the little one is tempted. This is a good thing, IMO